Where are you from and when did you begin your Chinese adventure?
I am from Istanbul, Turkey. My China adventure started in August 2013.
Why did you decide to come to Shanghai and was it a fast decision?
I was working as payment systems Turkey Country Manager for an American company at that time and I wanted to do something different, I felt that I had to take my life to a whole new level. I got job offers from all over the world and when Shanghai offer came, I said that's it, this is my calling.
Why Shanghai? Because I wanted to be somewhere that I had no idea about anything but could learn from scratch. I wanted to stay in this non- stop learning mode and Shanghai is giving me that. It wasn't a fast decision, I prepared to go abroad for 6-8 months, planning, talking to my family and friends as they thought that I was going nuts to go somewhere that I had no idea about. So it took me a while but it is so worth it.
Did it take you a long time to adapt to your new life?
Not really, I am picking up the culture and language quickly, hmmm Chinese is in a different category though hahah. I don't resist to change, cause that's painful but if you stay open and embrace the changes and use it for the good then that's where you start to grow.
Have you ever had any moment here when you thought of coming back to your country or leaving China?
I had my ups and downs but I had terrible times where I was crying while cycling and asking why me! But I never let these ruin my China experience. I don't take my eyes off the goals so I don't see the difficulties as walls but rather bumps on the roads and you learn how to deal with them. I am not a quitter. I go and conquer my fears and become stronger. I knew that it wasn't gonna be easy cause then everyone would do it right, but I am not the same person I was 2 years ago, exactly this day.
What was the best and worst thing that happened to you in China?
That's an awesome question. I had the best and as well as some of the worst experiences. Let's start with the worst things haha.
The worst thing I remember was that I lost a lot of money by trusting a word of a Chinese person. Can you imagine how scary it was to be in a country where you're broke? I didn't let my family and friends to know about it cause it was my decision and I needed to see what I could do to stand up on my feet again. Even though I had a contract and written messages, none of them meant anything and what happened was that I had to face with the results. You know what they say, it doesn't matter what happened to you, the thing is what are you gonna do about it. I had to manage the left of the money so I skipped dinners and slept early not to feel the hunger and make it to the next day. Some of my friends were telling me that we had time difference even though we were in the same city haha but they didn't know that I was going through a very difficult time. Needless to say that I wasn't a big fan of hearing 'I told you !'
If you think that that was it, no! There was this potato salad in the Japanese market next to Jing An Temple, that I used to be able to only stare at it as it was expensive back then, 30RMB :) After a while I managed to gather 30 RMB of coins. I went straight to the Japanese super market. You should have seen my face while grabbing the salad hahah. I came to the cashier, gave all my coins and finally got my salad. As they didn't give me any chopsticks, I was in rush to my place on Yanping Lu. I was cycling so fast that I didn't see the bump on the road. As I jumped very hard with my bike, I watched the salad jumping off the basket and falling in the middle of the street. I pulled aside, it was still in one piece in its package. I walked to the middle of the street and I was "THAT" close to getting my salad back but of course, I saw a car coming from the left side with all the lights on to warn me. I had to step back and saw it smashing my salad all over the street. I was super angry, yelling behind the car in Turkish and English. For a while I just stood and was looking behind the car with empty eyes...There was nothing to do...I sat down on the pavement and cried over my food. That moment opened up some doors to some social responsibility projects in my mind that I hadn't thought before. I went back to my place and slept early to get rid of the emotional baggage.
The next day, I was ready to sell my camera. Taking pictures is beyond passion for me but I was ready to do that. I told one of my friends who has the same passion as me, that I was gonna sell my camera and she told me "Whaaaattt? Why?" I had to tell her what I was going through and she said "you're not gonna sell your camera. You love it, selling it will make you feel even worse. I'll give you money.". I didn't even ask for money but as she knew me quite well, she suggested and she saved me from falling flat on my face. When you start to free fall off the cliff, the universe either gives you the wings or holds you at the right time.
There was also another moment where I was homeless for a day! But this is another whole different story haha.
The best things...The difficult times taught me how to listen to my heart. The best things happened when I started to turn my pain into hard hard work and focus on the solution rather than the problem itself. Through this mindset, I set the entrepreneur in me free. I used the hardships as my fuel and I made the fire burning in me stronger than the fire around me. I founded Expat Neighbors and I met amazing people, some of whom became my close friends and volunteers through Expat Neighbors events. I started my blog and inspire people around the world to take the leap and help them start following their dreams.
I always say that I have ‘love hate relationship with China’ – I think most of us do – sometimes it is amazing, sometimes the craziest things happened all at the same time. How do you handle that?
I love it! Every day is a new adventure for me. I find Pudong view futuristic but when I walk on the street, I find myself running away whenever I hear someone spitting. I love to take the taxi and enjoy the city view but hate to get lost in a taxi when I am in a hurry for a meeting. But it taught me to be more patient. Back home when there is sth small, well for me small haha, some of my friends get crazy but I am so laid back. They ask me how come I am so patient haha and I am like you need to come to China.
Which 3 words would you use to describe your life in China ( besides ‘crazy’ of course ;) : 1 verb, 1 adjective and 1 noun ?
explore, unique, hidden gem
You came up with a really great idea to improve the expat life in Shanghai – how was this idea ‘born’ and what is it exactly?
The terrible moments opened my eyes and made me realize the problem of an expat "being lonely among crowds" and led me to light the neighborhood spirit. I started to approach people on my floor, building, compound, street, at the super market, in the gym, at the traffic lights. I gathered 90 people in 3 months and we started to organize dinners, movie nights, pyjama nights, beer nights, running together, travelling together. Soon people from other districts wanted to come too and soon Expat Neighbors was born as a neighborhood movement and a lifestyle which aims to change the habits and improve the expat life. We breakdown Shanghai into districts and help expats to meet other expats, returnees and businesses starting from their neighborhoods and help them to expand their network to whole Shanghai. Creating a home away from home is the only way to help each other to grow and discover our opportunities both personally and professionally. We are working on our website and app, and we have teams in major cities around the world to turn this into a global community.
What advice would you give to any woman who wants to start a business in China?
The most important thing is to write a manifesto to yourself. What are you willing to commit to yourself to be able to achieve your goals.
You need to consider the worst case scenarios as well. You need to be prepared for the downs of the business when things get tough.
No matter what, don't forget to listen to the lonely voice of yours that whispers to you.
And choose your people carefully. If you're the smartest in the room, then it is time to find smarter people than you so that you can protect yourself from your ego and keep learning!
I see that China changes everyone, including myself. Do you feel it has changed you and in what way?
I have changed so much! The destination doesn't matter but what matters is what kind of person you have become when you arrive. I was a corporate slave in Turkey, working 24/7 to make someone else's dream come true and forgot to have an actual life acting as if I had another life at the bank. I felt like I hit bottom rock and when I decided to take my life into a whole new level, I got rid of my fears cause I was focusing on the excitement of new experiences, discoveries and working on my life. I started to learn Chinese, Kung fu, started solo backpacking trips for 1 to 3 months a year, write about it and inspire people all around the world through my blog http://whiletravelling.com I began to teach Economics, International Business and Psychology and make a difference in young mind's lives and with Expat Neighbors improve the expat lives in major cities starting from Shanghai. I am thankful for the experiences which made me 'me' and I am excited for the coming adventures and amazing people I am going to meet.