Do you still remember your very first, foreign language textbook? Or better yet – can the whole generation of your home country still name the main characters from that book? The ones that guided you through those new, strange sounds and weird combinations of letters? Because guess what?! China does! Or at least the post – 80s generation. Why? Well, here's some vital historical info you might want to know. So – time lapse - about 20 years ago, when laowais and Western culture were even more rare in China than giant Pandas ( true fact – my Chinese teacher in Chengdu told me that a foreigner visiting the zoo back then was more picture worthy than the national pet). China is opening up. The first one –child generation starts learning English hua. Middle–school students meet a cartoon couple that will accompany them for a looong time till graduation– Li Lei and Han Mei Mei. Innocent teenage students mastering the die-hard exchange 'How are you? I am fine, thank you. And you?'. Li and Han eventually rose to the status of icons in the collective memory, but not thanks to their English skills. It’s because all the Chinese people who were banned from the joys of life and told 'study hard and learn English!' projected their young hormonal desires onto the lovely teens. And got attached to their little companions so much that they kept them alive, helping the couple transition from paper to the online matrix of the 21st century. But it doesn't end here. A few years ago the LeiMei team made a come back to Chinese schools' textbooks again, disappointing their old fans though. Contrary to nation-wide expectations, the couple did not end up marrying each other (and the most agreed-upon reason is that LiLei failed to buy an apartment, so HanMei Mei broke up with him and married a tuhao to satisfy her parents). And allegedly that was the hottest headline on weibo for a week, once the information saw the light of day and the love was broken for the whole generation. HOWEVER....we would not be in China if they didn't eventually sneak into ...WECHAT stickers fulfilling the dreams of their fans becoming naughty lovers, who still educate masses. With a twist! Because who cares about learning English now, when the number one desired language is Zhongguo hua! And, its slang of course! HOWEVER! The two are more busy flirting than doing the proper translating job, so here’s a guide for the ones you definitely need to know and apply them properly.
不作死就不会死 - bù zuò sǐ jiù bù huì sǐ – ‘no zuo no die’
This one should already be familiar to you from my early episodes. But if you are a China newbie, then a quick summary – ‘If you don’t do stupid things, they won’t come back and bite you in the ass, but if you do – they most certainly will’ Picture – putting light bulb in your mouth or licking icy cold metal – just for pure experiment. These kinds of situations.
2.加油 - jiā yóu – ‘add oil’
When your friend tells you he/she quits his/her full time job for the sake of their start up business or just to focus on brushing up their, let’s say, guitar skills unbothered by such mundane thing like work, all they need to hear from you is this friendly encouragement and ‘jiā yóu’ fits just right.
3. 怂sóng – ‘follow your heart’
To understand this one I had to wechat - stalk my dear source Marilyn a few times to finally get it. So here is the logic. The character 怂 sǒng in dictionary means 'terrified' but in daily life it has slightly different meaning. It consists of 2 characters : 从– cóng - follow and 心 - xīn - heart. Let’s say some green tea bitch bullies you, maybe even stalks your boyfriend. You want to fight back but you are too scared because we all know that hell hath no fury as lǜchábiǎo scorned. So you don’t do anything and just follow what your heart tells you (‘you coward!)
4. 笑 点 在哪 xiào diǎn zài nǎ – ‘where is your haha point’
The exact meaning is 'laughing/haha point is where?'Let's say you have a mean colleague who wouldn't go for a day without teasing you. If you just want to focus on your wechatting/blogging/reading and maybe a bit of work instead of hearing his/her attempts to make fun of you, just shut him/her down with this one, to make sure they know their amusing skills fall completely flat
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5. 我 是你的菜wǒ shi nǐ de cài – ‘I am your dish’
Quite direct. Sometimes instead of playing games, you can get out of your comfort zone and in a very straightforward way say ‘I am your ‘dish’ - 菜 cài - which is Chinese way of saying ‘I am your cup of tea – you should like me’duh!
6. 叫我妹 妹jiào wǒ mèi mei – ‘call me meimei’
That may sound perversive since 妹妹 mèi mei means ‘sister’.However in some provinces like Guangdong or Canton that's how guys would call their girlfriends. Still, my Shaghainese friend commented 'I don't really get that though'
7. 你行你上啊啊 nǐxíng nǐ shàng ah! – ‘You can you up’
Classic Chinglish here, but after a moment, understandable. 行 –xing means capable and 上 shang – go. So the whole phrase would be 'If you are capable, bring it on!' If someone boasts to you that they can rock the party hard till morning hours and show up at work 8 am sharp, fresh like a morning flower, then all you could tell them is 'You can you up' (and in case you were wondering about 啊 – it's the Chinese 'exclamation' – the famous 'ah!'
8. 好 厉害 hào lì hai- ‘Holy cow!’
If the above mentioned friend pulls off what he boasted about, you can properly reward him/her with this statement. The wechat sticker says 'Holy cow' because of the sound similarity again: holy - hào lì but still even with this 'mistranslation' conveys the same meaning – 'Wow?!Awesome'
9. 我想要两 西柚 wǒ xiǎng yào liǎng xī yòu – ‘I want to see you’
Another naughty one with a hidden meaning, where you need to play with sounds rather than translation. Here is how to 'decipher' it - 想要 - xiǎng yào means want and 两- liǎng – 2, but it could replace English 'to'. 西柚 - Xī yòu sounds like a child talk for 'see you'. So it could be translated as 'I want to see you' BUT 两 西柚 means '2 grapefruits' so ….yes, Lilei is asking a girl for a private show with '2 round fruits' involved.
10. 我喜欢你 wǒ xihuan nǐ-‘I momoda you’
喜欢–is the traditional 'like' but nowadays more cool way to express it is to say 'momoda' – especially close friends would use it to say I 'kiss kiss' you – that's how you can differentiate the level of friendship. You know you are special when your Chinese friend 'momoda' you. He or she does not JUST like you ,but momoda you A LOT!
We all have extraordinary troubles around communicating our intentions and emotions clearly and honestly. Especially in another language. Let alone in Chinese. Fortunately the China we are living in now has changed quite a bit since the day LiLei and Han Meimei stepped into stardom circa 20 years ago. Despite our struggles with the language barrier, thanks to these stickers we don't need to spend hours thinking of the sentence that would express our hidden desires. All we have to do is choose the right sticker to say what we really feel to those who deserve to hear (see) it. But since the memorial day for the founding of the PRC is just around the corner, let's spend 5 nostalgic minutes to check out the 'Li Lei and Han Meimei' song, that will bring us back to the times where nobody would have thought that China would be the one stepping up the communication game and bringing it to a whole new level. Happy Golden Week everyone!