One of my best friends I was lucky enough to meet in Shanghai is a very talented painter. Her main focus are portraits. However, very unique ones, because the faces of her renditions are usually blurred ( just like the two you see above - these are her masterpieces as well). When I asked her why, she told me that’s because she gets inspiration from life and to her most people in Shanghai wear ‘masks’. Therefore it is difficult to have meaningful friendships here if people are not authentic and spend most of the time pretending someone they are not. There might be something about it, because I have heard that opinion before. Nevertheless, I managed to make quite a lot of friends with some amazing people over those last 3 years here and by no means were they wearing a mask at any moment. One might say I am lucky, which is definitely true, but I think it is also a matter of attitude. I don’t say I am the one who knows it all, but for those just coming to huge metropolis likke Shanghai, or just any new place, especially by themselves, my life lessons might come useful at some point.
SOCIAL NETWORKING – PREPARE BEFORE YOU ARRIVE
In the times when the whole world is connected and everyone has at least one, if not two accounts on different social media websites, hit there in the first place! There are gazillion of different groups whose focus are various activities in Shanghai ( as well as Beijing and other cities). So just a week or two before your arrival, try to meet the online crowd – introduce yourself and ask around – I am sure foreign veterans will be more than willing to help you!And if you are coming to Shanghai - make sure you join the group Expat Neighbors ( click HERE to find out about them!)
APPS
For China specifically, your MUST have are two apps: Wechat and NIHAO. Particularly the second one - NIHAO - will connect you with all the people across China. Best proof – my own recent experience. In the very last moment I decided to go to Inner Mongolia for National Holiday. Just booked a flight and a hotel.Then at the airport in Shanghai, I posted a picture of my hand holding a passport on NIHAO app and commented that I was about to fly to Inner Mongolia. In less than a minute a girl from Hohhot offered her help and involved her family and friends to welcome me. An hour after my arrival I met her sister in law, who took me to lunch and assisted with arranging my entertainment for the entire stay. Isn’t it amazing how small the world has become? Take a look at the video below to find out more about this genius app!
CONTACT YOUR EMBASSY OR CONSULATE
Although nobody likes officials, still that might be a great go – to spot as well! Some embassies are more ‘party going’ than others, but all of them tend to hold at least monthly meetings for the expats from your country so why not check it out?! In a city like Shanghai, it is all about your 关系 - guān xì ( connections/relationships) , so start building them as soon as possible!
EXPLORE THE NEW SURROUNDING WITH HELP OF LOCAL TRAVEL AGENCIES
Of course it is not difficult to figure out the city and surroundings by yourself, particularly when we got every single field of our lives covered by apps. But no matter how handy they might be, they won’t have a beer with you after adventure loaded day. Hence, look for local travel agencies that organize city day trips or even whole weekends away from all the hustle and bustle. Nothing is more bonding that getting out of your comfort zone with others. And don’t second guess yourself that the trip might be full of inner circles – there are quite a few people who come to Shanghai unattached and hoping to build their social background. In Shanghai try definitely travelers - society.com and okdeal.com
LOOKUP SOCIAL EVENTS LIKE WORKSHOPS IN THE CITY VIA WEBSITES ABOUT SHANGHAI
The cool direction that social media have been taking recently is that a lot of them have become platforms for people who actually want to meet face to face. Websites like meetup.com help you find events matching your own interests in any city in the world or even create your own. Besides that, the number of websites about events in Shanghai is constantly growing, just like number of gathering ideas that local businesses come up with to attract new customers: beauty workshops, wine and food tastings, dance classes. To say that you are spoilt for choice would be an understatement.Especially that recently the offer got enriched by amazing option for girls to get together and make friends in a chilled atmosphere - GLAMOURLAB. Check out their website to find out more www.glamourlab.cn
Below - pictures from awesome beauty workshop organized by LALU NATURAL COSMETICS! (click HERE to see the official FB page!)
BE KIND AND HAVE COURAGE – AS CINDERELLA’S MOTHER USED TO SAY!
When you arrive in the Jungle of Shanghai, you might feel overwhelmed at first and it might seem like everyone else knows each other while you are the lonely outsider. Guess what – there are quite a lot of people who probably think exactly the same. And all this international hot pot living here is very open and remember full well their beginnings. That’s why when you are, let’s say, taking the first walk around your new neighborhood and you see some other expats, who seem well settled here, don’t get shy and just approach them with a smile. There is this special phenomenon here, as I have noticed, that Chinese experience tends to bring out better character features within ‘foreign colonies’ and they are extremely willing to give each other a helping hand, especially to ‘China newbies’.
When I was a little kid, during my holiday getaways my parents – to prevent their only child from being socially disabled – used to almost literally push me to go and talk to a bunch of other kids hanging around the playgrounds. When I was telling them ‘But I don’t know them, do you think they will want me to join?’, my mother would respond ‘Just go and try! Why not?!’ ( When I grew up, she said the same when I told her about my sudden idea to move to China, btw) Same applies now and here – especially that we – Shanghailanders – never get bored with the new stories of other people ‘ Why and how I came to China’. Just be kind, have courage and smile – and you will quickly find your new family away from home.